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Published by the Library Staff Association of the University of Oregon Library System
No. 28, January 2001
Getting It
My brother was trying to explain the joke to me:
"You don't get down from an elephant, you get down from a goose. Down is like feathers. Feathers come from a goose, not an elephant, see?"
I didn't see. "Feathers?"
"Yes, like in a pillow."
I frowned. What did a pillow have to do with it? The picture in my joke book showed a man dressed in safari clothes, in a howdah on the back of an elephant. A boy and a goose were standing next to the elephant, looking up at him. I felt perplexed.
"I just don't see what a goose has to do with getting off an elephant." I said slowly.
My brother struck his forehead with the palm of his hand and let out a groan. My mom poked her head in the room. "What's wrong?" she asked.
"Well, I just don't get this joke: 'How do you get off an elephant?'"
"Down! Down! How do you get down from an elephant!" shrieked my brother.
My little sister looked up from her coloring book. "I would use a ladder," she said.
"Or maybe the man could jump onto the pillow. It isn't very far" I suggested, looking at the picture.
My brother was looking at my mom with a grieved expression. She laughed. "Humor is a tough concept," she said to him. "Be patient."
At dinnertime, my brother and I told all the jokes we'd read in our jokebook. My sister listened for a while, but she couldn't resist joining in.
"OK, OK, I've got one: Why did Batman pour ketchup on his head?" She paused dramatically, looking from one face to another. We were all stumped.
"I can't guess--why did Batman pour ketchup on his head?" Dad asked.
"Because he wanted to!" screeched my sister, laughing heartily.
"That is so dumb!" exploded my brother. "That is so stupid! That is not a joke!"
"Nuh-huh, it is so," said my sister. "It had a beginning part like a question, then you wait for people to guess, then the end part is funny, and everyone laughs."
"There's a little more to it than that," said Dad. "It's got to be silly and make sense too. OK, listen: this guy comes back from safari and says to his friend, 'you'll never believe this, but I got up one morning and shot a lion in my pajamas', and the other guy says, 'What was a lion doing in your pajamas?'"
We all laughed, including my sister.
"Get it?" Dad asked my sister. She thought for a moment. "Not really," she answered.
Dad rolled his eyes. "I guess you'll just have to practice until you really get it," he said.
Fateful words. My sister practiced until she almost drove us mad. Every night we heard jokes about Batman and Robin, or Captain Kangaroo and Mr. Greenjeans, or about Wally and the Beaver, but none of them were any good. Things got so bad, Dad had to ban jokes from the dinner table. Of course, he was the first to break his own rule.
"Who's buried in Grant's tomb?" he fired off at my brother one evening.
My brother nervously choked down a hunk of meatloaf. "Lincoln?" he ventured.
"No, dammit! Grant is buried in Grant's tomb!" bellowed Dad.
"I thought it was a trick question!" whined my brother.
Mom shot Dad a hard look. "That's enough of telling jokes at the dinner table!" she ordered.
"Wait--Wait--I've got one!" my sister piped up. We all groaned. Dad held up his hand. "Let her tell it."
"OK--Why did Batman arrest the Boy Wonder?"
We waited. My sister was thinking hard, wrinkles of concentration creasing her five-year-old brow.
"Because--because--he was Robbin' " she said at last.
We gave her a standing ovation.
My sister was as surprised as everyone else. "Wow, was that a real joke? Man, that was hard"
"As hard as getting down from an elephant," I agreed.
--LR Sexton
The
Holiday
Potluck!
On December 13th, the Browsing room became a restaurant. There was so much food--everything from dumplings and lentil salad to turkeyand shortbread--that it was delivered in waves. Thank you to everyone for sharing their wonderful goodies. This observer feels that the Holiday Potluck was an undeniable success.
Here are a few photos to remember it by...
David Landazuri encounters the salad table
The very tempting desert table
Linda Zimmerman staffs the LSA dues table
A group of merry diners
Another group of revellers
1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. Be sure to fill in the missing lyrics completely. Use any resources
that you like. Submit your answers
by January 26 to Fact
File. The library staff member whose submission has
the most correct
answers will win a small prize--an edible one this time. In the
event of a tie, a
random drawing will be held to determine a winner. The
answers, and the
name of our winner, will be announced in the February
LSA
Newsletter.
Congratulations to the Library Diversity Committee (formally known as
LDAG), who has been selected to receive the 2000 UO Martin Luther King
award for classified employees and officers of administration. This award
is given to individuals who have made the most significant contribution to
the value of diversity and creating a welcoming workplace.
Congratulations to all members, past and present:
1999/2000 Library Diversity Committee
Diane Sotak, Chair
Library Diversity Advisory Group (established March 1998)
Linda Long, Chair
Library Diversity Task Force (established October 1996)
Laine Stambaugh, Facilitator
The award presentation is scheduled for 11:30 - 1:00 pm on January 25,
2001 in Gerlinger Lounge. Please plan to attend and support your
co-workers!
Submitted by Rose Thomas
Knight Library Vending Machines Did you know that every time you buy something from one of the vending
machines in the Knight staff lounge, a portion of the proceeds goes to our
staff association? It's true! While most of the money is distributed to various university
accounts, LSA has long received a small but significant income from these
two machines. In the last six months, we've received $157, an average of
$26 per month. If you would like to know more details about LSA's vending
income, please see this
report. If you don't find just what you are looking for in the staff lounge,
you
can of course step next door to the student lounge and select from those
vending machine offerings, or sample the Daily Grind fare. Revenue from
the
student lounge machines goes to a Library account that is supposed to be
used to benefit students, faculty and staff. The last time the Library
used this account was to buy the white delivery van. The door to the Daily Grind generally stays open all hours the Library
is open. If you ever happen to find it locked, you are welcome to open it
with your A key. If you need to report a problem with any of the Knight vending machines
and/or get a refund, you may do so at the Circulation Desk. Want to
suggest
a particular snack? Feel free to contact anyone on the House
Committee. So remember: Support your staff association! Buy lots of snacks and
drinks in our lounge! J --Lisa Sieracki, Ways and Means Committee
The dues campaign got off to a slow start this fall, but picked up quickly
in the last half of December. The total number of dues-payers increased
from 87 last year to 102 this year (as of Dec. 28), an increase of 17%.
Thank you to everyone who paid dues! We really do rely on your support to
be able to put on our annual potluck, honor each other when we retire,
provide newspapers for the staff lounge, etc. And because of the support
of the Library Administration, LSA will receive an extra $3 for each
dues-payer, for a total amount of $918.
We also offer our special thanks to those very generous individuals who
donated money to LSA above and beyond their dues, bringing the combined
total up to $1064!
Finally, thanks to the many LSA volunteers who helped on the campaign by
collecting dues at the potluck, soliciting their coworkers, and serving on
the Ways and Means Committee.
--Lisa Sieracki, Ways & Means Committee
Marilyn Reaves started work today as an Office Specialist 1 at the
Knight Library Press.
Kudos!
To many, 2000 was the "Millennium year." While this may
be true, it would be even more accurate to say that 2000
was the "Year of Joanne." A seemingly ubiquitious award
winner, Joanne Halgren outdid herself by becoming the first
recipient of the Virginia Boucher/OCLC Distinguished ILL
Librarian award, by single-handedly submitting the
100,000,000th OCLC ILL request and by receiving one of
the first UO Library Faculty Fellowship awards. Congratulations
Joanne on your many fine achievements!
Kudos to Sara Brownmiller, whose achievements were honored with a UO
Library Faculty Fellowship award.
The Library Diversity Committee won the Martin Luther King award for
2000. Be sure to attend the upcoming award ceremony to cheer for your
coworkers! See Diversity Doings
for time and place. We salute the members of the LDC for their fine work.
Singing for Your Supper
by TERRY McQUILKIN
As we are reminded every year during our string of
seasonal holidays, food
is very important to us. So it's not surprising that we
find the things
that we eat mentioned so frequently in music--in love
songs, folk songs,
holiday songs, even in television theme songs. In the
twelve excerpts
below, the food items have been taken off the table; see
if you can put
them back by filling in the blanks. For extra credit,
identify the songs
from which these lines are taken.
Diversity Doings
Leslie Bennett
Michiyo Goble
Joni Herbst
David Landazuri
Linda Long
Bruce Tabb
Rose Thomas
Ex-officio: Laine Stambaugh
1998-Sept. 1999 Membership
Leslie Bennett
Charlotte Conlin
Diane Sotak
Bruce Tabb
Rose Thomas
Carrie Yates
Ex-officio: Jon Cawthorne, Laine Stambaugh
1996-1998 Membership
Charlotte Conlin
Mary Grenci
Linda Long
Bernie McTigue
Rose Thomas
Carrie Yates
Ex-officio: Jon Cawthorne
Dues Campaign a Success!
Welcome New Staff!