LSA News

No. 100, September 2009

A Week Without a Night
(continued)

L: You recently experienced your own wedding last February. Thinking back to that time, can you articulate what seemed so very different with this Norwegian wedding you attended? Customs? People in attendance? Food? Location? Type of ceremony?

T: Well, there were lots of little differences, like location, duration, and budget. Tina (the bride) only had a few months to plan. She acts as the tour manager when the band is on the road, and since they'd been touring pretty much nonstop since the release of the new CD in September, she's been busy "herding the American boys." She went back to Norway in late March to stay with her family and work on planning.

Her wedding was outside at a golf course — mine was inside in a ballroom. The length of the reception was one of the big differences, with ours at 4 hours. The Norwegians partied all night, until 3 a.m! It was definitely my first 12-hour wedding reception. I think the fact that we were only getting about 2-3 hours of twilight for our "nights" helped everyone keep going strong. An open bar certainly didn't hurt either!

Many of the women and men wore their traditional costumes to the ceremony, called bunads (pronounced boo-NAHD). They are dresses (for the women) or suits (for the men) that are made of wool and colored or embroidered with special designs that denote the region of the wearer's birth. Tina's mother, stepmother, one of her stepsisters and several of her aunts all wore their bunads. Tina's mother's fiancé, Frode (pronounced FROO-duh) also wore his bunad, complete with a dagger. Judy (Tina's mom) told us that while the bunad was traditionally tied to region, nowadays girls have been choosing based on color and style, rather than what their home region calls for. The dresses were very heavy, and WARM! Most of the folks who wore them changed between the ceremony and the reception.

Norwegians also like to give several speeches or toasts to the couple during the reception. The length of the speeches really surprised me. Rather than the brief toasts at our wedding, in Norway people brought pages and pages of things to say! While most of the toasts were in Norwegian, the majority of the speakers did a brief synopsis in English for the eight Americans in attendance. Her stepsisters also wrote a song for her, including an English verse, and we joined with the group sing-along in as best we could.

L: Was there one thing in particular that surprised you about the ceremony or about the people in attendance?

T: The guests really went all-out as far as dress goes. I was surprised by how many of the women were in fancy cocktail dresses. Tina was trying to get Michael's friends to dress up a bit more before we headed over to the ceremony. They borrowed shirts from Frode, but didn't really understand why Tina was making a big deal until they got there and realized they were underdressed. Luckily the rock star cachet/curiosity about Americans was in full force, so they pretty much got away with their thrift store threads. Dave and I have a pretty eclectic group of friends, so our wedding had more folks along the thrift store spectrum than the prom dress crowd.

Also, the cake-cutting ceremony isn't done in Norway, so everyone was very excited to see this American tradition at the reception. Everyone ran up to the dessert table and crowded around to watch. Tina said she felt like a movie star with all of the cameras flashing!

L: Was there any particular problem you experienced during your trip that you suspect was cultural in origin?

T: Well, I didn't really have any issues other than noticing only about two women that were larger than a size 12, which made me feel like I stuck out even more as foreign and stereotypically American. David and his father did try to take Frode's dog for a walk in the woods near the house one day when we were all out at the golf course setting up. They got halfway into the forest, let the dog off the leash, and suddenly realized the dog didn't understand English commands! Luckily it responded well to its name, so they managed to get it home safely.

L: If you were giving advice to anyone who planned to travel to Norway in the future, what would you tell him/her?

T: Budget lots of money, or know lots of Norwegians! We were so, so very lucky to have Tina's generous family feeding and sheltering us. The hospitality was truly amazing. The exchange rate, however, was not, so be sure to check before you leave so you won't have any unpleasant surprises. Also, you get a better exchange rate from your credit card than you do at the currency exchanges, so let your credit card company know you're going, and just use that. The cash looks neat, but you lose a lot of money with the fees they charge to convert it.

Most folks speak English. Even if they don't speak well, they can certainly understand you.

Wear sunscreen, because you'll spend most of your time outside. The summer is short, but the days are long, so Norwegians spend every possible second out in the sunshine while they can.

Be prepared to remove your shoes upon entering a home. I wished many times that I'd brought shoes that could slide off easily.

L: What is your favorite memory from this trip?

T: Tina asked me and her bridesmaids to help her write her vows. They did them in English, and she wanted to make sure that they made sense. It was really sweet to see her getting emotional about joining the family.

L: Tusen takk (Thank you so much) for sharing!

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